Tranquility's Grief Read online

  All heads turned to Aneese who did not waver in her gaze from Bethany. “Lady Bethany is correct.”

  “That is a trifle hair splitting,” Jud protested, throwing his hands into the air, looking at Aneese. “She cannot actually think the Council will allow her to blatantly disregard their orders and simply march off with the entire Elven Service!”

  “She does,” Bethany said, her tone neutral, “and she plans to.”

  “Oh horse shit,” Jovan said. “Beth, you don’t know what you’re getting into.”

  “Have you lost your mind?” Allric blew out a breath and ran his big hand through his hair. “A winter invasion, north. Gentle Goddess on the wind, Bethany. Half your troops will be frozen to death by the time you get there.”

  “We cannot sit here and let the Rygent Islands fall to Daniel. We can’t let his Magic support go unchecked.” She spread her hands. “We are at war. It’s time to behave like elves and fight it.”

  Jud crossed his arms. “Have you been sober enough to have a plan?”

  She did not acknowledge the jab. “I leave in two days with three thousand soldiers. I’ll only take the battle-hardened troops and those who have done time in the north. They’ll know what to expect. I’ll march straight to Taftlin—”

  “Bethany!” Allric exclaimed.

  “Are you crazy?” Jovan shouted.

  The others also pitched in their protests, though their words were drowned out by the booming voices of the other two commanders. Bethany ignored their protests. She was in charge now. It was time for her to find a use for her parentage and this was the perfect way.

  “Any soldier in my army who becomes sick or injured will be left behind for Jovan to pick up.”

  “Me?” Jovan snorted. “I’m not going north in winter. Fuck that nonsense.”

  Aneese rapped her cane against the side of her chair. “Lord Jovan! You will watch your language.” The old elf turned to Bethany, her eyes narrowed. “Lady Bethany, please continue your plan.”

  Bethany nodded, pushing down the excitement in her belly. Planning a war was nothing to be excited about. “Jovan will bring another eight thousand troops. He’ll leave Orchard Park in a week with one thousand, taking the longer route through Ellentop to gather more forces there. He’ll take a slower pace and stop along the eastern boundary to gather our allies and get them marching. After all, they are waiting on us to move. They will follow if we give the word. Jovan will arrive a month later than I estimate I will arrive.”

  Bethany produced a small map she’d been carrying in her pocket. She pointed at a circle on the map. We’ll meet on the Taftlin boundary, near Kershaw.”

  “Isn’t that where brandy is made?” Kiner cocked an eyebrow.

  “Malt whisky. Which means that they will have large stores of barley.” She narrowed her eyes. “And we can all eat barley while we wait out the Taftlin winter.”

  Allric sucked in a deep breath, loud enough to draw attention to himself. “You’ll be marching through enemy land.”

  Bethany raised her chin. “I am the daughter of Apexia. They will let me pass.” After a beat, she amended, “If not, I will burn a path through their land. I’m going north. You are all coming with me.”

  Allric’s features hardened. “Not all of us.”

  “No, I suppose not.” Nervous butterflies churned inside Bethany’s empty guts. “Jud, you will stay here and administer the Temple.”

  Jud raised his chin. “Of course, I will. That is my assignment.”

  Bethany bit back a snarky remark. “You will be in charge of organizing the war effort as a main base of operations, as well as continuing the relocation of people to Orchard Park. Also, I will need you to oversee the procurement of supplies both for here and sending to the front.”

  “I will not engage in any activity that is contrary to the will of the Elven Council.”

  “You will do as you are ordered,” Bethany snarled, “or you will find yourself on a raft back to Wyllow.”

  She did not wait for Jud to respond. She turned to Allric and said, “You will be responsible for the quick and smooth transition of power from yourself to Jud.”

  Disappointment spread across Allric’s face. “I am to go back to Wyllow and marry?”

  One side of Bethany’s mouth curled. “No. You will leave for Taftlin at the end of winter, bringing new supplies, arms, and troops with you by boat. Your marriage will have to wait, Lord Allric.”

  Bethany knew Allric well enough to understand the look on his face; confusion, uncertainly, and relief spread across his weathered features. In a softer voice, she said, “You are too valuable to lose in the midst of a war. Jud will need your help and our fleet will be partially rebuilt by then. Early spring is a good time to begin the trek north to join us.”

  “Aren’t you overconfident in your abilities?” Jud asked, sarcasm dripping from his words.

  “No. Just confident.” Bethany turned to Eve, who stood next to Jovan. “Eve, you are now a field commander. Three hundred soldiers will be available for your picking. Your main role will be coordinating supplies ahead of the main troop and clearing away any…resistance while I come behind you.”

  Eve inclined her head.

  “Kiner, your role—”

  He held up a hand. “I know what I need to do. I’ll also coordinate with Eve.” Kiner’s eyes seethed with anger, but his tone was resigned.

  Bethany fought back the guilt of sending Kiner back into the field to assassinate again. Yet, he and his band of unknown soldiers were the best they had. After this, she promised herself she would send Kiner away to join a monastery and to retire in comfort, seeking the peace of Apexia. Until then, peace was not an option. Kiner’s skill at subterfuge and, when required, removal of figures of authority, was unrivalled. He was needed.

  “Erem, you are coming with me. You’ll be my second.”

  Erem’s eyes grew wide and his mouth gaped open. He recovered quickly and nodded his head. “Of course.”

  “Why are the women here?” Jud asked, looking at Amber and Lendra.

  Bethany found herself wishing she’d decided to send Jud north. An accident could be arranged. She steadied her thoughts because this was the breaking moment. “They are here because I plan to bring them with me.”

  Chatter rose up from everyone, except Aneese, who had already voiced her concerns. Bethany raised her hand to call for silence.

  Allric glared at her. “You are not taking Lendra and Amber.”

  “Um, Bethany…” Lendra said, her voice full of fear.

  Bethany closed her eyes and hoped she was not about to make the biggest mistake of her life. “Lendra, as Lady Champion of the Silver Knights, I hereby conscript—” The deafening roar drowned Bethany’s words, but she shouted over them, her words clipped and precise, “conscript you to act as a diplomat for the Silver Knights and to assist me as necessary.”

  Lendra’s eyes grew wide and she looked at Jovan. “Can she do that?”

  Jovan only looked at Bethany, anger in his eyes. “Yes, she can.”

  “I need her.”

  Jovan glared at Aneese. “You are going to let her take Lendra? She’s a baby.”

  “I am not a baby!” Lendra snapped.

  Aneese’s words were careful. “I would prefer Lendra be sent back to Wyllow where she can be safe.”

  Bethany turned to her little sister and said softly, “Playing it safe never helped Drea. Come and help me. Prove you are a grown up like the rest of us.”

  Lendra’s eyes overflowed, but she straightened her shoulders and nodded once. “I’ll go.”

  Bethany inclined her head, pride swelling in her. Of course her sister would go. Lendra was young and naïve, but she would shake that off soon enough. Bringing Lendra was the hardest step. The next would be easy by comparison.

  “Amber, as Lady Champion...”

  Amber waved her hands. “I’ll go willingly!” She recovered her voice and said, “You don’t need to force me.”
>
  “I forbid you.”

  All eyes, including Bethany’s, turned to stare at Allric. He looked at the floor, though his hand was now wrapped around the pummel of his sword. Bethany stared at him.

  “I need them both, Allric.”

  “No.” Allric’s reply was unyielding, firm, and held the hint of violence. He looked at Amber, and Bethany saw something in his eyes that she’d never seen before: affection. “You will not take either of them.”

  Bethany looked back at Amber, before turning her gaze back to Allric. “I need her, Allric. She will come.”

  “I forbid it.” Allric’s fingers tightened on the hilt of his Blessed Blade. “They will remain here.”

  “Allric,” Amber interjected, “I will go.”

  “Stop talking, Amber,” Allric growled. “You are staying.”

  With three strides, Bethany stood toe-to-toe with Allric. “No. I am taking her with me.”

  Bethany was not prepared for Allric’s massive fist to slam into her jaw. The force of Allric’s punch caused Bethany to crumble to the ground in an awkward pile. Before she could scramble back and regain her feet, Allric pulled his Blessed Blade and rested its gleaming tip against the hollow of her throat.

  She stiffened, afraid to breathe.

  And, she was very, very afraid. Allric had never pointed a sword at her in anger. Silence pressed against the room. Bethany could hear and feel the dust blowing across the dirt floor. Allric’s sword shook, but the wildness in his eyes spoke for the rage he felt, not uncertainty.

  If it was Jud, she’d have used her forearm to push the sword away, rolled, kicked his shins, and skewered anyone foolish enough to point a weapon at her throat. This wasn’t Jud. This was Allric. Allric. Her mentor. Her friend. The man she’d idolized as a child and wanted so desperately to grow up and resemble.

  And he wanted her dead. Allric wanted to kill her.

  “Apexia’s mercy, put the sword down,” Jovan said. “Allric, calm down before you hurt someone.”

  “Lord Allric,” Aneese said, pushing herself to her feet, “you are pointing a weapon at the daughter of Apexia.”

  Allric shook, clenching the fist not holding the weapon. “Amber is not coming with you. I will not let you harm her.”

  Cold sent shivers through Bethany’s body. She knew the look in his eye. Somewhere along the way, amidst the rubble and death, Lord Allric had silently, undeniably fallen in love

  If it had been reversed and they wanted to hurt Arrago, she would have held a sword to Allric’s throat, too. She’d beaten Jovan when he’d merely insulted Arrago. She understood Allric and knew, not guessed but knew that no words from her could change his mind.

  “Allric, enough.”

  Amber’s strong, calm words clipped the silence. Bethany had rarely heard anyone speak to Allric with such unyielding strength. Bethany could hear Amber’s boots hitting the dirt and the shadow of the young woman blocked the glare of a flickering candle.

  “Put the sword down.”

  “Amber, step back,” Bethany said.

  “Do not speak,” Allric snarled at Bethany, his eyes wide.

  Amber did not step away. Instead, skirts brushed against Bethany’s cheek before Amber knelt next to her. A dark hand slipped between her throat and the sword.

  “I said no.”

  Bethany’s heart pounded. “Amber, please.”

  “Consider your actions, Allric. Are they the actions of a Knight?”

  “Get away,” Allric growled with rage like Bethany had never seen boiling on his face.

  Amber simply shook her head, dark curls skirting across her chest. “I will not allow you to hurt her. Put your sword away.”

  “Do not issue me orders,” Allric snarled and tightened his grip on the sword.

  Bethany closed her eyes, in case death was about to descend on her. She was prepared for it, but she did not want to watch it come at Allric’s hand.

  “I promised that I would always speak up when you were wrong. Allric, you are wrong today. The army needs to go north. Put your sword away,” her voice turned husky, “and let me go.”

  Bethany’s heart pounded faster as both Allric and Amber withdrew from her throat. She opened her eyes and let out a long breath. She would have stood immediately but the rushing blood through her body made her vision blur and she wondered if her legs would even support her.

  Amber offered her a hand and Bethany took her, hoisting herself upright. Allric stood there, staring at her. He tossed his Blessed Blade to the floor. A puff of dirt enveloped it.

  “I threatened the life of a Knight.” He stared at her, his eyes wide and feral. “I am…” His voice cracked. He gasped for breath and pushed a hand out toward Amber, preventing her from going to him. “What have I done?”

  Bethany licked her lips. Going north was important, but so was Allric in her life. “Out.”

  Jovan stayed. “Bethany, we need to –”

  “Out,” Bethany said, not taking her eyes off Allric, who’d turned his back to her, his hands running through his hair. “Now.”

  With whispers and significant glances, the others left. Once gone, Bethany sucked in a breath. “Allric…”

  He lifted a hand. “Apexia’s grace, please.”

  She smiled, a sad smile even though he could not see it. She stepped forward and laid her hand against his back and realized that, not since Arrago, had she touched someone. No wonder she felt so alone. They’d touched her, but she had not touched them back. “Allric, look at me.”

  He turned, his face flushed from shame.

  “Allric,” Bethany said, reaching her hand out but pulling it back. “I need Amber to come. She can help me deal with the Magic and my own Power. You know that.” Bethany looked down at her feet. “I...I didn’t realize that you and her...”

  A bittersweet smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “I didn’t know myself.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I am so sorry.”

  “I beat Jovan to a pulp because he called Arrago the hired help. Of anyone, I understand.” She reached out again and, this time, touched his arm. “I will protect her with my life, you have my word as a Knight.”

  Allric stared at her for a long moment before he nodded. “Go. Kill them all.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  The Diamond must conquer her fear or the Viper will conquer her.

  -Prophecy of the Diamond, Second Tablet

  Activity overtook the temple. Servants shouted at each other as they packed supplies. Homeless civilians and soldiers and priests argued over blankets. Even the senior officials of the Temple of Tranquil Mercies fought like hungry animals. As Bethany walked across the courtyard, she muttered to herself about the argument she’d just lost.

  She’d relented and agreed to take more gold than was sensible, and less food than was necessary. Both Allric and Aneese argued that she could buy food as she travelled. Both commoners and soldiers would be less willing to attack a travelling army who brought gold with them. Whereas, the people of the temple would be stationary and had to wait for supplies to arrive and spring, when the next harvest would be ready.

  Bethany caught a glimpse of Kiner organizing a number of younger soldiers and civilians. By the shapes of the bundles, Bethany supposed it was their tents and canvas tarps. She waved at him and he returned it. A few more words that she couldn’t hear and he jogged to catch up to her.

  “We’re almost done clearing the tents out of storage.” Then, he amended, “Well, the parts we can reach, at any rate.”

  Bethany nodded, pleased that something was going smooth. “How many people can we house with them?”

  Kiner broke his gaze.

  She leaned forward. “How many?”

  He looked back at her. “Eight hundred at best.”

  Bethany winced. She bit her lower lip and flicked it with her tongue. “All right, we’ll need to take half of the seamstresses, tailors, and leather folk. Those types. We can purchase fabric and leather as we come across
it. They can prep the tents.” She thought for a moment. “We should bring as much wax and tallow as we can steal from Aneese, to treat the hemp tents.”

  Kiner grimaced. “Tallow?”

  “We’re not going to find enough wax in time,” Bethany said, shrugging. “At least we’ll have the blankets.”

  Kiner grimaced.

  “What?”

  “Aneese won’t let us take blankets that aren’t our personal items.”

  Bethany threw up her hands. “None of us have personal items. It’s been months and we’re still picking up belongings off the shoreline.” She pinched the bridge of her nose. “I’ve already had to delay leaving by six days. Is there anything else I should know?”

  “Pretty much the only food that Eve has purchased so far is pickled eggs and salted cod tongues.”

  She blinked. Eve and a small group of Knights went ahead of the advancing army to purchase up food and send back promissory letters. “You have to be joking.”

  He shook his head. “She also managed to get us smoked squirrel meat for stew.”

  Bethany’s throat burned as her breakfast and bile both surged upwards, but she choked it back down. “I’ve eaten worse.”

  “Yes, but it was usually cooked by Jovan.”

  A snort escaped her. “Yes, well, we won’t let him near the soup pot.” Bethany grew somber. “Is this plan insane? Going north, I mean.”

  “Yes,” he said bluntly. Then he smiled. “Insane, but the right thing to do. Let’s go kill the sons of whores.” They were silent for a moment before Kiner said, “It’s been nice having you back, ordering me around.”

  She had not expected that or the sheepish grin on his face. She narrowed her eyes. “Are you flirting with me, Kiner?”

  He opened his mouth and then shut it. Instead, he cocked an eyebrow. “As if you’d be that lucky.”

  “Are you drunk?” she blurted out, and coughed away a chuckle when three servants walked past them. “You’re drunk, aren’t you?” She sniffed the air. “You don’t smell it.”

  “I’m practicing flirting.”

  “Um, why?”