Tranquility's Grief Page 13

  Kiner shrugged. “I figure things are getting back to normal now, with the impending death and destruction. It would be nice to find a new way to annoy Jovan. I think I’ll make flirting with him my campaign goal. I might send him over the edge.”

  “The painted peacock might like it,” Bethany said with an awkward laugh. She did not believe his comment, but she also didn’t know why he’d flirt with her or anything. Her sister had been flirting with him. Her feelings soured. “You aren’t planning...with my sister?”

  Horror spread across Kiner’s face. “Apexia’s mercy, Bethany. She’s a child.”

  “She’s over eighty.”

  “A child,” he said firmly.

  “Something’s going on with Allric and Amber. She’s only twenty or so.”

  Kiner frowned. “She isn’t an elf or even an elorian. It’s different.”

  “How?”

  Kiner shrugged. “Arrago was only twenty something. And I’m not ready to think about Allric and anyone.”

  “Me, neither.” With the conversation steered away from Kiner flirting with her, which she was happy about, she said, “I was so sure about this last week.”

  “We should have marched the minute the dust settled after they blew this place into pieces. People are going to die, but if we don’t go and stop Daniel, many more will die. Politicians don’t understand that.”

  His words were the balm she needed. “Thank you. I’m doubting myself a little today.”

  “The old Bethany wouldn’t have admitted that under the pain of torture. Don’t do weak-kneed on us now.”

  She slammed her fist into his bicep.

  “Ow!”

  She grinned. “Better?”

  “Much.”

  Bethany caught sight of a young woman in tattered uniform leggings and a brown tunic. She couldn’t place the girl, but knew she should. Bethany walked over to the latrine diggers. Soldiers immediately snapped to attention, grimy shovels in hand while civilians stopped working and bowed their heads. At least they had finally stopped bowing to her.

  “You,” she said, looking at the human girl who couldn’t have been more than seventeen. “I should know you.”

  The girl merely stared at Bethany, blinking.

  “Answer my question, soldier,” Bethany demanded and then looked at Kiner, hoping he could offer assistance.

  “Everyone back to digging. Lady Bethany, let’s keep walking.”

  When they were far enough away that the others could not hear, Kiner said, “Her name’s Rose. She was the soldier who fought beside you against Joseph.”

  Bethany cringed at the name. The Magic user had broken into her bedroom and killed a young servant. It was there that she learned Magic could not kill her, unlike everyone else. It was there that Bethany first unleashed her Power since childhood.

  It was there that this tiny soldier fought beside her with bravery, when surrounded by corpses and her friends abandoned her.

  “What’s wrong with her then?”

  Kiner leaned close. He smelled like sweat and garlic, but surprisingly not in a bad way. He reminded her of Arrago, after the first night they made love. Bethany’s heart pricked.

  “Tongue cut out. She was caught in Orchard Park when it was attacked. From what I hear, she got separated from her training group. Someone grabbed her and...” Kiner’s voice cracked and he cleared his throat. “You can guess the rest.”

  A mixture of hot rage and guilt attacked Bethany. Rose was young – perhaps too young to be a soldier – but she charged a Magic user with nothing more than a mundane sword and a helmet that didn’t quite fit her. Bethany had meant to find her again, but things slipped through her fingers.

  Because you were whoring with Arrago instead of doing your duty.

  Bethany hardened herself against the inner voice that had the annoying tone of her mother. She focused instead on the memory of Torius and his words to her when she first became a Knight.

  It is not what we feel or say. It is what we do that matters.

  Bethany added “or fail to do.” She had a lot to make amends for, it was true. But she could not do it arguing with herself. She would find a way to help this girl. After she dealt with Allric.

  She looked at Rose’s dirty, forlorn face. “Before we leave tomorrow, I want to talk to her.”

  She would make amends.

  ****

  Amber surveyed the room, satisfied with her work. Thirty candles cast a soft, flickering glow that danced on the walls, hiding the chipped stone and plastic. She had gathered a dozen or so pillows and arranged them on the floor. A bottle of cherry wine and a bowl of cured olives sat next to it. She had to wash Jovan’s laundry for that wine; it had better do its job!

  Her insides knotted when she heard Allric’s heavy footsteps down the hallway. She couldn’t hear his thoughts this time; she assumed it was because of her own lack of focus. Nerves racked her body and she shivered from them. She mustered her courage as best she could for the task at hand.

  “Did you tell Lendra I was busy?” Allric said, his voice clipped.

  “Yes, sir, but she said it was important,” a male voice replied. “She said you had to come straight away.”

  “Send word to Lady Bethany to let her know I will be late.”

  “She said to meet tomorrow morning.”

  The footsteps stopped and Amber could imagine Allric’s confused expression. “Tomorrow? This isn’t going to take all night.”

  “Lady Bethany read Miss Lendra’s note, laughed, and said to come tomorrow morning.”

  “Bloody women.” Allric blew out a breath and knocked on the door. Even though Amber knew he was right outside, her heart still jumped from the anticipation. She heard him clear his throat.

  “Miss Lendra? It’s Allric.”

  It had not taken much convincing to get Lendra to give up her own, very rare, private room. Lendra agreed to sleep with Bethany and Jovan outside and left all of her bedding and articles in the room. In fact, Lendra so gleefully gave up the room that Amber worried she might need to have a talk with the girl.

  What is taking her so long? Blasted, I am busy. “Lendra, are you there?”

  Allric’s thoughts, and words, shook her out of her daze. She slipped the latch and opened the door without looking out. In a low voice, she said, “Come in.”

  Not really paying attention to his surroundings, Allric stepped inside and Amber latched the door behind him. He froze, staring at her. His thoughts slammed against her but she had prepared her mind against the onslaught and only one thought escaped her barriers.

  Merciful Apexia. Am I dreaming?

  “Good evening, Allric.”

  He stood against the wall, a terrified expression across his face. Amber resisted a chuckle. It did not matter that he was a hardened military general. When he looked at her, she could see the young man inside of him.

  “Hello,” he said with a shaky voice. He stared at her. “You’re not Lendra.”

  “No.”

  He pressed his lips into a thin line. “No, you’re not.” He looked around the small room. “You decorated?”

  She licked her lips. “Do you like it?”

  Allric took a step away from the door, only to stand behind the table that was pushed up against one corner. “It’s unexpected.” He gulped. “Amber?”

  Apexia, please don’t let her ask me. I don’t want this. I want this. Please let her ask me. Apexia, help me.

  Amber gave him a soft smile, hoping to ease his mind. “I have a plan.”

  He nodded. Sweat beaded on his forehead and glistened in the candlelight. “I assumed.”

  Amber approached him and reached for one of his trembling hands. She wrapped her fingers around his and squeezed. “I’m leaving in two days. You do not want to marry some stranger. I don’t want you to marry one, either.”

  “Amber…”

  “I cannot bear the idea of leaving without,” she paused, pondering her words. To make this plan work, she
needed to entice him, not scare him off, “Without being with you.”

  Allric stumbled from her grasp and hit the wall. He closed his eyes and took a long, deep breath. “Amber, I appreciate…I…” He took a deep breath. “I cannot take advantage of you.”

  She smiled, her heart fluttered and thumping. She reached up and touched his face, now shadowed with growth. He’d taken back up the practice of shaving every day. He did it so that the beard would not remind her of a man who’d violated her body for nothing more than his base desire to control and for a crazed Magic user’s spell. Rygous’s holy name, she loved this man.

  “If I’d known, I would have shaved,” he said with an awkward smile on his face.

  “Allric, I love you.”

  His eyes grew wide. She could hear him repeat the words inside of him but he did not say them. They were beautiful in her thoughts, but she wanted them said aloud.

  “It isn’t that simple.”

  Amber ran a hand along his chest. “Let’s make it simple.” She leaned forward and planted a small kiss where his heart thudded through muscle. She smiled, listening to his heart pick up speed. Encouraged by this, she continued to kiss his chest, running her hands along his sides. Resting her hands on his hips, she pushed her body against him. All of his was hard against her.

  He gulped and grabbed her. Firmly, he kissed her lips. A hungry, frustrated kiss. She struggled for air, having not expecting it. He held her sides and picked her up, planting her bottom on the desk. Papers, ink pots, and whatever else slammed against the stone floor as he swept his hand behind her.

  “Amber,” he whispered, gasping for air between kisses. “I love you.”

  “Then love me,” she whispered back, grabbing the edges of his tunic and tugging it over his head. She pulled away from his kiss long enough to let her gaze fall over his torso, chipped and scarred from centuries of battles. A particularly nasty scar across his shoulder caught her attention and she ran her tongue along it.

  Allric groaned and clenched her hair so tight that she whimpered. He let go and stumbled backwards. Amber regretted the sound instantly. He looked terrified. “Did I hurt you?” He ran his hand through his hair. “I didn’t mean to.”

  A short laugh escaped her. “Allric, my love. You won’t hurt me.”

  “The last man to touch you...” His words died off. “What am I doing?”

  She wondered how she could love a man more than this giant. She imagined that he had used his size many times in the past to intimidate plenty of recruits and foe. Yet, standing next to her with the candlelit flickering around him, shirtless, scarred and pure all at the same time, she wondered how he could hurt anyone. Least of all her.

  She listened for his thoughts, hoping to find the right words to calm him. Finally, she simply said, “I trust you. Now, please, trust me.”

  “Amber, I can’t do this without...This isn’t something that I’ve planned to do with you. I’ve thought about it often enough, which I’m sure you already know.”

  She nodded and grinned at the glow of crimson that spread across his face. “Particularly when I have my back to you.”

  He tried to make a stern face. “I might hold on to my chastity vows tighter than most, but I’m not dead. I know a beautiful woman when she’s bent down in front of me.” He flushed brighter.

  Feeling that the situation was slipping from her hands, Amber decided to use the last available ammunition she had. She slid off of the desk and pulled the ties at her shoulders, her frock sliding down her body. The cold air snapped at her naked body but the look of awed shock on Allric’s face was worth it. His face slackened and a soft moan escaped him.

  “I want you.” She took a deep breath and used the last arrow she had in her quiver. “Love me tonight. Marry me in the morning.”

  His jaw dropped, more than when she’d dropped her dress. “Marry you?”

  “I know you will not let your desires give you a night of pleasure. So, I will marry you Lord Allric, if you will have me.”

  “Marry?” The word escaped him in a hush. “You mean it.”

  “Allric, I love you. I want to spend this night with you. When you arrive in Taftlin, I want you to sweep me off my feet and take me to my tent and do things to me too shocking to speak out loud.”

  He reached out and touched her face, cupping her chin. “I love you, Amber.” Then, a small smile formed on his lips. “Yes, I will marry you.”

  His mouth covered hers and Amber’s knees grew weak. He said yes! She hooked her thumbs into the waistband of his trousers and pulled the ties, then slid her hand over his hardness and squeezed.

  “Apexia forgive me,” Allric muttered. He grabbed her hips and thrust her to the table. He kicked away his trousers and pressed his body against hers, the heat instantly rising between them. Hungrily, he kissed her hard, his hands holding her face.

  As he finally gave in and let his passion take over, she chuckled that he had not even gotten her to the pillows. If she had known he’d be this easy to seduce, she’d have done this months before.

  “I love you, Amber,” he whispered as he pushed inside her.

  She hid her face from him as best as she could. Tears streamed down her cheeks, a mixture of recovering from the past and the excitement of the future. “I love you.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Only one will be blessed by the Creator Gods.

  -The Prophecy of the Diamond, Second Tablet

  Sweat dripped down Arrago’s back and pooled around his trousers even though frost dusted the ground. Gulping and gasping, he struggled to control his breathing in the frigid morning air. He kept his body as tight as possible to the inside of the blacksmith’s cart and waited for the familiar sound of clinking mail to pass by him.

  If Bethany could only see me now.

  He clenched his muscles, forcing her name from his mind. He needed to focus on hiding and not being grabbed by the dozen soldiers combing yet another village looking for him. He would have wagered Daniel would forget about him eventually, but there was no such luck. It appeared that Arrago would be a hunted man for the rest of his life. If the growing numbers of soldiers were any indication, his life would be a short one with a bloody end.

  “It seems your reputation as an outstanding hider is well-earned, Arrago Cedar.”

  The proverbially bottom dropped out of his stomach. He peeked out from under the horse blanket. Standing in the cart was a woman with ample hips and light hair with a hint of red. He squinted. She looked like Bethany, with her half-smirk and confident stance.

  Stupidity and idiocy, Arrago. Stupidity and idiocy.

  “If you’re not one of the soldiers,” he whispered, “Please let me hide. My life depends upon it.”

  The smirk faded and she waved a hand in the air. “They’re gone. I put it into their heads that you went to River Falls. You will be safe for several days.”

  Uncertainty clawed at him. He flipped his gaze to her forearm, which did not bear the Rygent mark. He looked back up at her. Was this Bethany’s sister, the one she killed? They never did find her body in the smothering ruins. This woman looked so much like her.

  Arrago scrambled to sit upright and then scurried backwards until he hit the back of the cart. He felt around for his sword, not taking his eyes off her. The intruder gave him a pointed look before staring down at her feet. She was standing on his sword. His heart sank.

  “For pity’s sake, Arrago.” She sighed heavily, the way that Bethany always did when she was flustered with him.

  Light danced around her. Her plain market clothes morphed into a flowing blue dress that shone like only a clear winter’s sky could. The air around them grew warm, soothing, and hinted of lilac. His mind was flooded with memories—his parents on their death beds, meeting Edmund, Bethany’s naked limbs wrapped around him, moving to the monastery, Father Arragous sneaking him cookies, killing the boy on Sir Eli’s stairs.

  The dream telling him to go to the Temple of Tranquil Mercies.


  Arrago gulped. Apexia. He failed to say her name, merely mouthing the words. She would surely damn him to eternity without her after his indiscretion with Bethany. He had always known it would end like this. He gasped for air. His gaze wandered, looking to see if the soldiers were indeed gone. He must’ve hit his head. That’s why he’s seeing her.

  The woman rolled her eyes. “You did not hit your head.”

  “Gentle Goddess!” Panic struck him. Apexia. He knew he’d have to face her wrath one day, but he did not want it to be today. “Please, Gentle Goddess, do not kill me. I will make amends, I promise. I have been doing everything in my power to make up,” his voice hitched in his throat and he gulped down the growing lump, “to make up for what I did.”

  She made a displeased sound and Arrago flinched away from her.

  She spoke, her words clipped and annoyed. “I’m not here to kill you for thumping my daughter.”

  He did not expect that. He made several grunted attempts to speak before managing to utter, “Huh?”

  The Goddess closed her eyes and let out an exasperated sigh. Just like Bethany. She shot Arrago an angry look and her voice run clear in his head.

  I am not just like Bethany!

  Arrago winced at her voice, clear and loud like temple bells next to his head. “My lady, I am humbled—”

  Apexia made an annoyed gesture with her hand, waving him off. “Yes, yes. You’re humbled. That’s not why I’m here.”

  “May I ask why then?”

  “I’m here to discuss your future, Arrago Cedar.”

  “My future?” he repeated, the words slow and delayed. “Anything for you, holy Goddess.”

  Apexia groaned. “I’m annoyed at you so don’t grovel. I’m here because I need your help, Arrago Cedar.”

  “Of course, anything.” His eyes widened. This could provide him the opportunity to atone for his errors. “I’ll give my life for you.”

  “Dying is easy. I require you to live.”

  He nodded automatically. “I will do anything you want.”

  Apexia sucked in a deep breath. Arrago swallowed; Bethany did that, too, when she was about to say something he wouldn’t want to hear. “You will organize the rabble of this country and become King.”