Tranquility's Grief Read online

  “True,” she said, “but many run when the ambush comes. You never did.” Bethany gave him a knowing look. “You won’t this time, either.”

  “Whatever happens...” he started, but his voice trailed off. He started again, stronger, “Whatever happens, thank you.”

  Bethany winked at him, even as she prepared her own mind for the approaching battle. Coming to her was Magic, evil and vile, full of a taint that would destroy them all if given a chance. She would not give it that chance. She would cut it down while she could still draw breath.

  Footsteps approached from behind, and a small figure in plate stepped onto the balcony. Bethany inclined her head and then stopped. A pair of bare, delicate, pale hands dangled from the otherwise completely covered soldier.

  And a blond, happy curl poked out from under the helmet.

  “Lendra!” Bethany shouted, and the clatter of metal echoed as heads turned to stare.

  “Hello, Bethany,” came the muffled reply from inside the helmet.

  “Good goddess, girl,” Bethany growled, “I told you to stay in the cellar.”

  “You did.”

  “Then get back in there!”

  “No,” Lendra replied.

  Bethany cocked her head. “Excuse me?”

  “I said no, Bethany. You are not in charge of me,” Lendra answered in a calm voice.

  “Lendra…”

  “No,” she replied again and pulled off her helmet, blond curls springing out of her tight braid. “I will not go. I will not hide. You are all I have left. Do you think I will sit in a cellar and wait to hear if my sister dies when I know that I could have saved you?”

  Bethany stared at her little sister, her mouth hanging open.

  “I lost Sarissa to Magic. I lost Drea to Magic. I will not lose you,” she said with a growl.

  Bethany just stood there, unable to speak.

  “You conscripted me. That makes me an apprentice Knight until you release me.” Lendra slammed the helmet back on, and Bethany heard the gasp of discomfort when it hit the girl’s nose.

  Next to her, Bethany heard Arrago’s muffled laugh. She glared at him, and his laugh turned into a cough. She glared harder.

  “I will behave like an apprentice and stand next to my sister,” Lendra said and stood next to them.

  Pride swelled inside Bethany. Lendra was terrified; her hands were shaking and the chain coif she wore jingled with every shiver. Still, Lendra stood there. Her innocent, precious sister refused to hide.

  But, Bethany could not let sentiment show on her face. “You cannot even put your helmet on without hurting yourself. How are you going to protect me?”

  Lendra turned to face Bethany and said, her voice muffled, “I’ll scramble the minds of anyone who touches you. I heard what you did at the Temple. I will find the strength to do the same here.”

  A chill went through Bethany. She could use raw force, even if she didn’t understand how it actually worked or could control it in any useful manner. Her sister, however, knew how to use hers. And while she lacked control, control was less important when the mob was overrunning them.

  “Mother will—”

  “I don’t care what Mother will say or do. I am a grown woman. I will stand here and if you will not let me, Arrago will.”

  “Hey!” Arrago said, raising his hands. “That isn’t what I said.”

  Bethany glared at them and Arrago took a step back. “Excuse me?”

  “Arrago said to ask you first. If you wouldn’t let me, I could stand with his men in the trees, away from the fight. That way, if they flanked us with Magic, I could help.”

  Bethany gritted her teeth in hopes of keeping the smile off her face. “Arrago, we’re going to discuss this later.” Then she drew in a deep breath and said, “Report to Erem’s position and tell him I’ll rip his testicles off with my bare hands if anything happens to you.”

  Lendra let out a little squeal of delight and rushed back through the window behind them.

  “She is very brave,” Arrago said.

  Bethany blew out a breath and tried to quell her fear for her sister. “And very, very scary.”

  ****

  “Riders approaching from the north!” Eve shouted from her perch.

  Arrago could see three teams of dog sleds approaching across the snow-covered field. Winter warfare was never pretty, no matter who outnumbered who. An army was more likely to lose to the frostbite than the sword. Perhaps Daniel would send words of concession or compromise.

  Bethany had gambled on Daniel seeing their fortifications and trying to starve them out instead of attacking them directly. She had said that’s what she would have done in Daniel’s place; surround them and spend a month of small raids, constant fires, and barrages, until their food ran out and they surrendered.

  Putting aside the fact that kind of plan scared the life out of Arrago—gracious Apexia, Bethany really was a hardened soldier—Bethany was missing one thing in the equation: human pride. Daniel was here because elves had marched on his land. He was here to stop a peasant rebellion. No Taftlin king would ever offer compromise against that slap in the face.

  Arrago held the hope that he would avoid a bloody war today. He did not want to fight. He did not want to see people die at his hand. He didn’t want to even think that it might be himself, or Edmund, or Bethany, or any number of others whom he’d grown to call friend.

  And he could not think that it could be Bethany who would fall.

  “Recognize any of them?” Bethany asked him. She stood next to him, in her mail armor, blessed blades, and heavy cloak. Her calves were wrapped with fur and leather to protect against the cold. Nevertheless, her cheeks and nose were red in the morning air.

  Arrago looked out at the riders, knowing Bethany had asked him because his eye sight was in fact better than her own. She’d never admit it, of course, but he’d caught her squinting on more than one occasion or asking people what they saw ahead. He suppressed the grin bubbling inside him and shook his head. Then, he peered at the middle dog team and frowned at the glinting image of plate in the rising dawn light. “Wait, isn’t that Daniel in the middle?”

  Bethany squinted, but shook her head. “I don’t remember what he looks like.” She gave him a sidelong glance. “You humans all look alike.”

  “So do you pointy-eared whores.”

  Bethany let out a snort. “I’ll miss that about Taftlin when I leave. It’s the only nation where a celibate is called a whore on a regular basis.”

  The painful haze of the night after Sir Eli’s death haunted his memory. “I’ve been too busy to fix that for you.”

  Bethany gave him an annoyed look. “Bastard.”

  “Slut.” He grinned at her.

  Bethany was about to clip him in the back of the skull, when a deep voice bellowed from beyond the pickets. “I demand to speak with the invading elven whore. And bring the traitor.”

  “That would be us,” Bethany said with a bitter grin. “Invading whore. That’s a new one. Come on, let’s see what the twit wants.”

  Arrago nodded and followed Bethany, nodding at Edmund for him to fall in behind them. Bethany motioned for Eve, who carefully climbed down the roof and jumped to the balcony to join them. She let out a snarl of pain and swore in a tongue Arrago didn’t understand.

  He gave her a quizzical look and she laughed. “I’m getting old. My knees hurt.”

  “I told you to stop jumping around or your career will outlive your knees,” Bethany chided as she ducked inside the window to go down through the building.

  “I’ve heard the lecture before,” Eve said with a sigh.

  “And yet you refuse to listen.”

  Eve winked at Arrago and said, “I’m nearing forty. All that’s left is a cane and deafness. Why bother worrying about my knees now?”

  Arrago laughed and followed behind. Not because he was letting Bethany lead, but because there wasn’t enough room for the two of them to walk abreast. And, besides, s
he was in fact in charge. She was the daughter of Apexia and had taken control of the Elven Service to invade a country under that banner.

  She really should go first.

  That did not make him a coward.

  Honest.

  Oh Apexia, please don’t let me throw up on Daniel. That would be embarrassing.

  They made their way past the frightened townsfolk, many holding butcher knives and smithing tools instead of swords, but nonetheless inside the building to protect it in case the outer pickets fell. Of course, if they blasted the place with fire, they’d all end up scattering outside anyway. But, at least they were somewhat safe, yet ready to fight.

  They exited the building and Bethany marched ahead, not waiting for him. Her legs were longer than his and he had to double step to catch up to her, but he did. She looked at him and gave him a sidelong smirk. Arrago’s heart thudded in his chest, walking past the fortifications. They’d prepared for just about everything. He couldn’t see much of Daniel’s army, but it looked to be nearly all foot, archery, and riders. Bethany feared siege engines, but thankfully Daniel’s impatience was too great to wait to build the giant devices. Instead, it would be old fashion fire, arrows, and swords.

  And Magic.

  He’d already dealt with that once at the Temple of Tranquil Mercies. He could do it again.

  They approached Daniel, marching through the formation of squares in the expanse between town and picket wall. Bethany had mixed his troops with both Knights and regulars, arguing that discipline needed to be maintained for those in the front who would be taking the hardest volleys early on. Their faces were frightened, but the calm resolve of the hardened soldiers around them held them together. It had been the right choice.

  Bethany stopped and Arrago quickly stopped walking as well. Five soldiers stepped from the square to pull up three large planks, which served as a doorway. Bethany exited, Arrago behind her. He looked behind him enough to see a dozen Knights rush out to surround Bethany and...and him.

  Arrago’s heart raced. In one short year, he’d gone from being nothing more than an initiate who Bethany sneered at during training, to being protected on the same level as Lady Bethany, daughter of Apexia herself.

  Thank you Apexia. I would not have done this without your insistence. May I bring glory and light to your name. May I survive what’s about to happen.

  Because, there would be no compromise now.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Death follows the Viper. Whatever is touched by its darkness turns to dust.

  -Aleu’s “The Agony of the Diamond”

  Sarissa closed her eyes, unable to block out the voices that swirled in her mind. Muted, twisted, angry words echoed around her, breaking down the barriers of her sanity. In fact, Sarissa was convinced she’d already walked past the barriers three days ago and what was left was merely the formality of sense. Soon, that would fail, too.

  Spill the blood of the guilty.

  What did it mean? The words sounded like the Magic texts she’d read over the years, but these were useless, unhelpful phrases. Nothing that said what she should do. Nothing to help control the waking nightmare around her.

  Sarissa opened her eyes. Her soul sight, or whatever it was called, still showed her the essence of her surroundings. She still did not look at the world through her true eyes. So, she knew the bugs and snakes and bats were not really there, but that did not prevent her skin from crawling.

  Purge the darkness from the light.

  What did that mean? She ran her fingers through what little of her hair that remained. Her scalp stung when her fingertips ran over the scabs where her hair used to be. She’d pulled out most of it when it had turned to long, spiked tendrils that lashed at her skin.

  Bring balance to yourself.

  If she could bring balance, she would have done it already!

  Embrace the clarity your fears prevent you from seeing.

  Sarissa panted, the voices growing louder. “I don’t understand,” she repeated. “Stop speaking, I don’t understand.”

  You. It could be you and not her.

  “Make it stop!” Sarissa screamed. “Make the voices stop!”

  “Sarissa! Calm down!” Robert shouted at her. “You have to be calm.”

  “Make it stop. Make it stop. Make it stop. Make it stop,” she cried over and over, shrieking out the words.

  “Quentin is trying, Sarissa. He’s trying to find out why this has happened to you. You have to be calm,” Robert urged.

  Sarissa rocked, panting. “Can’t be calm anymore. Can’t be calm. Nothing left. Embrace the light. Embrace the darkness. I can’t do both, no I can’t.”

  She slapped her legs, bug guts splattering her skin. “Make the fuckers stop!”

  “Apexia’s might, Quentin, do something!” Robert snarled.

  “There’s nothing he can do,” Sarissa whispered. “Nothing. It’s all over. Nothing.”

  And Sarissa caught sight of a gleaming beam of salvation in front of her. A sword, long and strong. It appeared on the floor, the light hitting it and blinding her from seeing the rest of the room. Yes, she could just cut her eyes out. She could cut the bugs out of her skin. She could cut the voices out of her head and make them stop.

  Sarissa grabbed the sword while she still had the sense to think and sunk the gleaming, glowing blade into her right forearm. Sun beams, happy and cheerful, sprang from her arm in an eye-piercing blaze. The bugs and welts and maggots shriveled and died under its glorious light. Warm spread across her body. Release. Sweet, sweet release.

  “Apexia’s shit!” Robert roared and he clamped down on her arm. Only a little light escaped from between his fingers.

  She fought against him. “You’re putting the light back in! I need to see it!”

  “You crazy woman! You just sliced open your arm with a piece of glass!” Robert shouted at her.

  “No! It was a sword! Put the sword back! Put it back!” Sarissa screamed at him, feeling her strength fade. She sunk her teeth into his hand and Robert howled with pain.

  “Quentin!” Robert snarled.

  Bottles and jars broke and clattered. “I’m trying to find the healing oil. I don’t even know where she keeps it!”

  “You can’t stop it. The sun wants to come out of me.”

  “Hurry!” Robert called out. “Quentin, hurry! She is spurting all over the place.”

  “What’s the hurry?” Sarissa asked, slumping against her husband. Strength sapped from her muscles, but waves of euphoric peace washed over her. “The sunshine is getting out.”

  “Merciful goddess,” Robert whispered. “Oh, my love.”

  Then, the veil opened before her.

  ***

  Bethany inclined her head to Daniel, not enough to be respectful, but enough to show she acknowledged his existence. She stared at him, waiting

  “Well, well,” Daniel said, a smirk forming on his lips. “It’s been a long time.”

  “Not long enough,” Bethany replied. “I assume you are here to offer terms.”

  “I’m not talking to you, whore,” Daniel said. He sneered at her before turning to Arrago. “I remember you from training. You were such a little baby. Now look at you.” He raked his gaze up and down. “The farmer grows up to become the big, bad rebel. It warms my heart.”

  Arrago scowled. “Are you here to discuss terms, or are you here to act like a child?”

  Bethany’s mouth curled upwards, but remained silent. Arrago didn’t need her help to snark off a moron.

  Daniel’s forced cheer quickly faded into a snarl. “Surrender, peasant.”

  “My name,” Arrago said, his voice a low growl, “is Arrago. Daniel.”

  “Majesty! You will call me Majesty, you pile of horse shit!”

  “Daniel,” Arrago replied coolly. “Murderer of children.”

  “You killed Sir Eli.”

  Arrago stepped forward and said, “You sent him here to spy on us. What did you expect me to do?”


  Bethany forced out an exaggerated yawn. “Look, I’m a busy elorian. Can we wrap this up?”

  “Surrender, or I will kill all of these people.”

  Bethany rolled her eyes. “Oh, you’d do that anyway, Danny.”

  Daniel stepped toward her. “What did you call me, whore?”

  “Back off, Daniel,” Arrago warned.

  “Shut up, peasant.”

  Bethany curled her lip and said, “My hand hurts, Danny, and I don’t feel like rearranging your nose again.”

  Daniel ran a hand across his the bridge of his nose, the crooked line visible. “I’ve never forgotten what you did to me, whore.”

  Bethany rolled her eyes. “Can you come up with a new word?”

  “Cunt,” he snarled.

  “Huh?” Bethany had never heard that word before, but Arrago let out a shocked gasp. “Oh, it’s a bad word?” She shrugged. “I guess I’m offended, then. Shame, Danny, shame. Are you here to deal or fight?”

  “I believe I’m supposed to be the one issuing the commands,” Daniel said, his chin raised. “I am the rightful king, after all. I have triple your troops –”

  “Double,” Bethany corrected. “Elves can count.”

  “Triple,” Daniel said through clenched teeth, “and your little group is no match for my army of Magi.”

  Bethany looked at the ornate soldiers on the sleds. “I crushed an entire army of Magi by myself, with nothing more than my own mind.” She leaned forward. “And I’m in the mood to do it again.”

  “I will kill you all,” Daniel sneered.

  “You are welcome to try,” Bethany said.

  Daniel scowled at her before grunting and slapping the back of his sled driver. The sleds turned, dogs barked, and they left.

  “What kind of idiot attacks in winter with this much snow on the ground?”

  Bethany watched the dog teams speed off. “An idiot who doesn’t listen to the advice of his generals, that’s who.”

  “Now what?” Arrago asked.

  “War.”

  ***