Tranquility's Grief Read online

Father Weiler leaned forward. “Do you both have teams or horses?”

  “Our dogs are hiding in the trees.”

  “Excellent. Let’s go. We have much to discuss.”

  Arrago looked back at Edmund who only shrugged.

  Edmund said. “At least it was priests looking for us and not soldiers this time.”

  ****

  Bethany slipped off her horse. Somber looks greeted her. She looked at them and then down at the lifeless body of Torius, Holy Father of the faith of Apexia. Dead. The man who was closest to that of a father to her. Gone.

  Torius was dead.

  She ran her hand through the stubble of her hair. “How’s Erem?”

  No one answered.

  “Kiner, how is Erem?”

  Kiner looked up at her, his eyes moist. Then, he stepped aside and motioned. Bethany prepared herself for the lifeless body of Erem. She was not prepared for that of her sister.

  “Drea?” she whispered.

  Jud cleared his throat. “Miss Drea was trying to heal Father Torius when an arrow took her in the back.”

  “No,” Bethany said, staring at her sister. “No, she was fine when I left. We killed…” Her voice trailed off and she stared at the limp form of her sister.

  Bethany stared at the image of her mother, who paced around the bodies, her brow furrowed. Tears streamed down her mother’s cheeks.

  Are they dead? Bethany demanded.

  Sacrifice was necessary.

  What does that mean? Bethany asked. Just answer me. Are they dead?

  Any moment now.

  Hope bubbled in Bethany’s guts. She could bring back her sister and Father Torius.

  No!

  Bethany snapped her head to her mother and saw the terrified look on her mother’s face.

  Apexia screamed in rage.

  Chapter Ten

  Sacrifice shall be the plight of the Diamond.

  -Prophecy of the Diamond, Second Tablet

  The ground shook and Amber clenched Lendra’s sobbing body tighter. Her ears rang and pressure mounted against her temples as…something screamed a long, agonizing shrill of agony. Amber squeezed her eyes tight and tried blocking out the sound.

  When the sound faded, Amber opened her eyes and saw blood tickling from Lendra’s nose. She touched her own and felt warm liquid on her fingertips.

  “What was that?” Amber whispered.

  “Mother,” Lendra said softly. “She’s angry.”

  Blood did not, however, slip down Bethany’s lip. Her Power wasn’t on par with her mother’s, but it was close. Amber stared at the sisters, Lendra’s eyes wide, and Bethany’s narrowed and cold.

  “Bethany?” Lendra whispered.

  Bethany didn’t answer. Instead, she knelt next to the lifeless body of her sister. Then, she looked at Lendra and Amber and gave them a shove away from Drea. Amber fell backwards, Lendra toppling on top of her.

  “What are you doing?” Kiner shouted.

  Bethany grabbed both Torius and Drea by the backs of their heads. And froze.

  A scream pierced the air. Amber realized that it wasn’t Bethany; it was Lendra.

  “Kiner, stop her!” Lendra shrieked.

  Eve, closer, clasped a hand on Bethany’s shoulder and froze in place. Amber grabbed Lendra, preventing her from touching her sister. The young elorian kicked and screamed as Kiner and Jud dragged her back.

  “Stop.”

  The commotion around Amber continued.

  “Stop!” Amber shouted over the noise.

  Kiner held up a hand and the noise fell. “What, Amber?”

  She could not hear Bethany’s thoughts, which was of course normal. She could hear Eve’s however. Or, rather feel them. Words did not form in Eve’s mind.

  Crushing despair.

  Darkness.

  Anger, so much anger.

  Bitter hate that sent chills under the skin.

  And one word. One word repeated over and over until Eve’s sanity threatened to split in half: Sarissa.

  “Merciful Rygous and Apexia alike,” Amber swore. She blinked away the tears and the rot in her guts that churned to loosen every bit of her insides. Then, burping back the rising food in her throat, she whispered, “Let Lendra go.”

  Jud did not release his grip until Lendra said, in a low voice too much like Bethany’s, “Let me go. Now.”

  Jud released her.

  “Do you have any idea what Bethany is doing?” Kiner asked, his voice frantic. He pointed at the joined foursome, gripped in agony. “She’s trying to bring them back from the wind. She did it once with a dying horse. Remember Apples? She did that when she six.”

  “Jovan’s mother once said it almost killed,” Lendra whispered. “Trying to bring back two people? She’ll kill herself and anyone who touches her –”

  “Unless we break the connection,” Amber snapped. “Eve is not strong enough. Lendra, you and I are. Isn’t that right?”

  Lendra paled and she gave Amber a frantic, pleading look. “Please, no. Please don’t tell them.”

  Amber looked at the frightened girl. Lendra, as old as she was, she was still in every real sense of the word, a girl. Young even by elven standards, protected and locked away for her life. Amber felt horrible for asking, but Bethany once risked everything to save her life. She would risk the same to save hers.

  Kiner looked between them and asked, “What’s she talking about, Lendra?”

  “Please, Amber. No.” Tears streamed down Lendra’s dirty face. Sweat, blood, and tears splattered her head and it clung to her face. “Don’t make me, please.”

  Jud cleared his throat. “What is going on?”

  Amber ignored him and turned to Lendra. “I know what you can do.”

  “Please, no. They don’t know.” Lendra sobbed, her hands in her face. “I can’t. I don’t know how to control it. I could kill them. Please, Amber, no. Bethany would be so mad.”

  “What are you talking about?” Kiner repeated, though this time his words came out with a growl.

  Amber took a deep breath. She could feel Kiner’s fierce protection of Lendra, and she could feel the girl’s sweet blush of love for the Knight. Still, some things were more important than love. “Lendra can affect thought and memory. She can adjust what is in a person’s mind. Can’t you?”

  Tears streamed down Lendra’s face and her body shook from the sobs.

  Kiner’s eyes widened and most of the Knights there took a step back. To his credit, Kiner did not.

  “If you don’t help me, you will lose two sisters today.”

  Lendra stared at Amber, her bright blue eyes reminding her of a doe. “I don’t know how to stop it. Bethany says this is bad. She should not be doing this. I’m going to lose both sisters.” Her sobs turned into hiccupping gasps for air.

  “I’ll help you.” Amber took Lendra’s hand and she grabbed Eve’s shoulder.

  The pain nearly consumed her.

  ****

  Darkness.

  Emptiness.

  Fear.

  Bethany did not recognize this place. She had only once tried to impart a gift of spiritual energy, her life, and that was when she was six years old. And it had involved her horse, Apples. Never a person and never two at once. Yet, she had to try something. Those Magi renegades had killed the mentor of her youth and oft only supporter, and her sister. The daughter of a goddess. The goddess. Her sister.

  She had to try.

  But this place was unfamiliar. Bethany’s mind floated in the darkness, the aching pain of loneliness drowning her. She should have been on the wind or, at least, inside their minds. Instead, she was in an unfamiliar place, floating through nightmares of nothingness.

  “Bethany?” Lendra’s small voice cried out. “Bethany, can you hear me?”

  “Lendra?” Bethany’s voice quivered. She hadn’t realized how empty this place was until she heard another voice.

  “Break the bond. You are killing yourself.” It was Amber’s voice this ti
me, soft but firm.

  “Where are we?”

  Silence.

  “Amber? Lendra? Are you still there?” Bethany swallowed hard. She did not know how to break the bond when surrounded, no sinking, through a smothering blanket of sadness. Breathing was difficult.

  Then, a familiar laugh cracked the darkness. Substance formed around Bethany and she stood in the light once more, still on another plane outside of the wind.

  “Sarissa.” Though she knew her fists were nothing but vapor, she clenched them nonetheless.

  Her twin formed in front of her. “What are you doing in my sacred space?” Her tone was not victorious. It was one of surprise.

  Bethany looked at her sister, stunned. “Where am I?” Then, she added, “And why is your soul still alive? I killed you.”

  Sarissa laughed again, the infectious way that she could bring a smile to Torius’s face.

  Torius.

  This is not your sister. This is the Magic abomination that possessed her.

  “You haven’t heard. Of course, you were too busy drunk on your own Power during the battle,” she said. Then, Bethany noticed that Sarissa did not look her in the eye.

  “Your eyes?”

  She nodded, her flowing grey-speckled red hair brushing against her dress’s bodice. “Robert was able to pour Magic oil on me during the battle and we escaped on a boat. But someone had stepped on my face before he could get to me. Crushed my eye sockets. The healers say I might eventually heal. They did all they could. Only time will tell now.”

  “Bethany, please!” This time, it was Lendra, her voice quavering, echoing.

  Sarissa did not seem to notice it.

  “You can’t release their souls. I’ve collected them.”

  Bethany cocked her head. “What are you talking about? What is this collection?”

  “I stole enough books from the temple to steal souls from Apexia herself. I can now prevent the souls of the dead from travelling to the wind. I can keep them for myself.”

  Bethany started at her, horror filling her. “Why?”

  Sarissa laughed. “Ask Mother.” Then, she said, “This is killing your friend, the dark Rygent.”

  Eve.

  “In charity, I will end this conversation.” Sarissa took a deep breath and said, “I forgive you, for trying to kill me. I expected nothing less from the heroic Lady Champion.”

  Bethany’s eyes snapped open. Her stomach rolled and she vomited. She choked and spewed until Kiner gently rolled her over. She continued to heave, chunks of partially-digested vegetables splattering her padded leather tunic.

  Bethany grabbed Kiner’s wrist, needing to touch someone. “They are gone. Forever gone.”

  Chapter Eleven

  Protection in peace. Triumph in war. Duty in death.

  -Motto of the Silver Knights

  Bethany escorted the dead back to the Temple of Tranquil Mercies. She rode second spot in the progression, letting Jud take the lead, who’d finally shaken his head clear. How arrogant she was on her way there. Fighting over something as childish as who took the lead. She was a leader, a field commander, the elite.

  And she’d squabbled over who would be in charge. How childish. How selfish.

  How unlike a Knight she’d become. She did not deserve the Blessed Blades on her back.

  Lendra sniffled and tightened her grip on Bethany’s waist. Bethany lacked the skill of comfort and warmth. She knew how to provide strength. Her sister would not travel alone with no one to lean against for strength. She could not offer calm words, but she could offer stability for her little sister, even as her own heart wrenched inside her.

  The scales had not balanced equally. Sarissa alive. Drea and Torius lost.

  She didn’t want any sister dead, but if one needed to stay dead, it was Sarissa. Drea had done nothing to deserve death. In life, she still had the hope of regaining her footing, her faith in life, her hope. Now, she was nothing more than a whispering soul caught in a web of Magic.

  And Torius! Gentle Goddess on the wind, Torius was like a father to her. She’d never known her own father, not even his name. Torius had always been the one to take her by the hand. He’d played with her and had given her that very first sword so long ago. He’d introduced her to Allric. She’d been as tall as their knees, staring up at these giants of men. The men she wanted to grow up and be. The men who were everything that love, and honor, and duty stood for.

  She could never make Torius proud now. Her sister was dead.

  She would never see Drea learn to smile again.

  No forgiveness found. No apology accepted. No healing rendered. No new memories.

  She gripped the reins. Her knuckles turned white and trembled. It was her fault. If she’d been sober this morning, perhaps she’d have had better wits about her. If she’d not been thinking about Jud and herself, she might have insisted further that her sisters not come.

  If she’d done her duty.

  Bethany’s heart thudded and a pressure like a great stone on her chest forced her to gasp for breath. Her error, her selfishness, her vanity had killed her sister. Her incompetence let her little sister stand there and watch Drea die in her arms. She wasn’t even there to protect them. No, she was off playing the hero, letting her anger control her. She was too busy slashing throats to protect the only family she had. Death was all she knew.

  You failed.

  That’s right, Bethany. You’re a soldier. Start acting like one.

  She gulped past the forming lump in her throat. She blinked away her tears as they reached the crowded causeway to the temple, where the homeless slept, waiting for when they could return to their burned and destroyed homes.

  Duty in death.

  Whispers rose in the crowd. People pointed, gasped, and clasped their hands over their mouths. She raised her chin and looked straight ahead. She would not let them see her cry. She would be the Lady Champion.

  You failed as a Knight, you worthless pile of horse shit.

  Once they cleared the causeway and began their ascent to the first courtyard, Allric and Jovan rushed out of Allric’s stable study.

  “What happened?” Allric demanded, looking at Bethany, not Jud.

  To his credit, Jud looked at Bethany. She turned her head away and remained silent. She was not the commanding Knight anymore. It was not her place.

  If you’d remembered your place, Drea and Torius would still be drawing breath.

  Jud cleared his throat and said, “Father Torius and Miss Drea are dead.”

  Lendra broke into hiccupping sobs and tightened her grip on Bethany’s waist. Bethany gasped from the pressure, but steadied her breathing. She kept her hands on her reins, eyes straight ahead.

  Allric’s face blanched. “What?”

  “Drea,” Jovan said, more to himself than to her.

  “Erem needs a healer,” Bethany said, her voice breaking. “Eve is with him on the dockside.”

  Jovan’s eyes grew wide and he looked over his shoulder to shout an order, when a young servant said, “I’ll get someone, Lord Jovan.” The girl ran off, a full sprint, into the temple where the sick room had been set up.

  “What happened?” Allric demanded.

  Jud detailed the attack to Allric, scrubbing clean the unpleasant parts of his conduct. Obviously, he was the one to organize the archers. Obviously, he’d been the one to dive into the fray to pull Drea and Amber back inside the shield wall. Obviously, he was the hero.

  Bethany let him. She didn’t need the accolades of Allric to know she was a good Knight.

  Was, you stupid, selfish bitch. Drea is dead. Torius is dead. You couldn’t even kill Sarissa properly.

  Bethany tightened her grip on the reins. “I need somewhere to bring my sister.”

  Jud glared at her. Bethany merely narrowed her eyes and glared back. She did not need to speak to him; he knew he was lying to Allric. He knew he’d cowered in the face of combat. He knew that she knew and would crucify his career and as the
daughter of Apexia, she’d get away with it.

  Jud broke eye contact first.

  “Yes,” Jovan said, his tone distant and confused. “Yes, of course.”

  Allric looked around, and then his eyes grew wide. “Amber? Where is Amber?”

  “She’s with Erem,” Lendra answered, her words hiccupping. “Amber risked her life for Drea. She grabbed a shield and threw herself on Drea. She was so heroic, Allric.” Lendra’s voice cracked. “Bethany was, too. She did everything she could.” She broke into tears. “It wasn’t enough, but she tried, Allric. And they hurt Erem really bad. And there was so much blood.” Lendra’s voice trailed off and she buried her face in Bethany’s armored shoulder once more.

  Tears poured from Bethany’s eyes. She pressed her lips together, determined to not let her jaw quiver, determined to hold back the tide of grief. In her own time and her own way, she would grieve. But not now. Not now.

  The dark voice of combat, the one that reveled in blood and gore, whispered, “Grieve by killing them all.”

  Yes. That was something she could stand behind.

  “Yes, Miss Lendra, the Knights preformed as well as can be expected here under the circumstances.” Jud straightened his shoulders. “I will arrange the burial rites with Mother Aneese. Jovan, please see to the corpses.”

  Lendra let out a gasp and her sobs came harder. She pressed her face against Bethany’s shoulder, her body quivering.

  Bethany released one hand from her reins and gripped her sister’s hand. She opened her mouth to string a line of elven curses at Jud, but Jovan beat her to it.

  Jovan grabbed Jud’s leg and hauled him off his horse. Jud landed with a thud and a puff of dust.

  “Jovan!” Allric snapped.

  Jovan stopped, putting his foot back to the ground. Then, he knelt down and grabbed Jud by the neck. In a calm, barely audible tone, he said through clenched teeth, “Listen very carefully. Drea was once my betrothed. Torius was someone I held in my highest respect. That little girl sitting behind Bethany just lost her second sister of the year. You will never call them corpses again or I will cut your tongue out. Clear?”